It is that time of year again. Time to wish Janeane Garofalo a happy birthday.

Happy 43rd birthday Janeane!!

Did it Again

Back in April, I did a two mile run that was below 15 minutes. It took me 5 months, but I just repeated the feat. Something about summer that slows me down. I have been running these two mile runs between 17 and 18.5 minutes all summer long. My theory for the summer slow down include the heat, and perhaps some allergies affecting my lungs.

Other recent exercise highlights include a 5 mile run 8 days ago, a 4 mile run 3 days ago, and a 27 mile bike hike on the Cannon Valley trail between Welch and south of Red Wing 2 days ago. For reference, I did that 5 mile run at a 8:53 pace.

Unwanted Project

I did a little job related web programming. My boss did a good job of disseminating this project to the people above him. This was about a month and a half ago. I have received limited feedback outside of my boss. Very disappointing. I tried to get this web page placed on a NWS web server. Because the page uses the Google API, and the NWS doesn’t have the necessary licensing for using the Google API, it didn’t make it on to a web server. So I used my account and placed it there. Probably broke a rule there, but no one seems to have called me on it.

So the only purpose the page serves now is a “lookity what I can do” thing. So without further ado, here is my CWA composing page. Information/instructions can be found after some scrolling down.

Go Through Airport Security as a Borg Day

The bags are packed and the tummy is a tingling, because you are on your way to the Effingham (Home of the Mother Effers. Go Mother Effers!) Star Trek convention. Your goal is to break into the professional Star Trek look-a-like ranks, and you are confident the Effingham convention will be your break through. The main rival will be Clorox Washingmachine. Clorox is so successful that he was paid big bucks to change his name to a name brand bleach.

The chosen look is of Jean-Luc Picard as he looked when he was absorbed by the Borg collective. In order to be at the top of your game, you must become Jean-Luc Picard as Locutus of Borg. So at your house, you spend hours getting into costume, complete with make-up and electronic gear, before hitting the road to the airport. Yep, you get strange looks and snickers as you enter the airport. Some long looks from airport officials. Finally at the metal detector, you are quizzed about your get-up. Remaining in character, you press the hand controller that adds a synthetic sound to your voice, and respond, “Your life as it has been, is over. From this time forward, you will service, us.” Well that did it! Out come the armed officials, and of course, you are tazed.

It only takes a few seconds back in the interview room to take off your gear for the strip search. You smartly leave character by this time, and obey instructions directed toward you. After the search, sitting in your underoos, you nervously twittle your fingers in such a way that gets your guard aroused. Unbeknownst to you, what you were doing was signaling for a sexual encounter. Now a misdemeanor for lewd behavior has been tacked onto your criminal resume. Eventually they set you free on $1000 bond, posted by your mother.

The next day, while you sit in your room masturbating to provocative pictures of Counselor Deanna Troi, Clorox Washingmachine wins another look-a-like contest.

Happy Go Through Airport Security as a Borg Day!

Camp in Front of Your Ex-girlfriends House Day

It has been a month since you have been dumped. All attempts at contact have been rebuffed. Time to show her how you really feel. A way that will most certainly result in her taking you back. She is on a business trip and will be arriving home that evening. You will be waiting for her in a tent, pitched on her front yard.

You set up your tent around 3 in the afternoon. You get inside and wait. While inside, a dog “marks” your tent. One of the street folk raps on your tent and asks if he could sleep in the tent with you (tell him to bugger off!). The squirrels are hopping on your tent and bothering you, so you leave a dish with whiskey in it. That plan works, they lap it up, get drunk and leave you alone. The street folk finish off the dish, and they stop bothering you as well.

Finally, just before dusk, there is another rap on your tent. One of the neighbors made a call to the police, and the police are now asking you to leave. You don’t respond. They unzip the tent to find you with nothing on but a large red bow around you mid-section and some whipped cream on your nipples. You have your portable stereo cranked, playing a love song from the 70s (I think it was “Wildfire” by Michael Martin Murphey). The cops do appreciate that you are pre-handcuffed. As they start to escort you to the waiting cop car, you start screaming to them about how they don’t understand true love. Things turn ugly when you start resisting and claiming that the cops work for the skull and X-bones hidden society. Thats when the tazer comes out.

As they guide you into the back of the squad car, the neighbors have their video cameras turned on. It is at this moment you realize, this may not have been the most thought out idea that you have ever had.

Happy Camp in Front of Your Ex-girlfriends House Day

Crescent Fresh

We did a Palm run to Palmer’s Bar this afternoon. I drove to the West Bank of the Mississippi right after work. So I was there at about 1:45, while the actual meeting time was going to be around 3:30 PM. With the extra time, I parked on the West Bank, and then walked across the Mississippi River on the Washington Street bridge to the East Bank. There were two bridges in the way between me and the collapsed I-35W bridge, so I could only get a glimpse of the downed bridge.

I kept walking to Pillsbury Hall on the U of Mn campus. This is where I took all of my Geology classes for my BS degree. I walked over there for one purpose, to get the picture that is included with this post (click on thumb image). My defacing of public property is depicted in this picture. My graffiti is the one that says, “Kurt of the Dirt ’87”. The ceiling in this picture is in the student lounge. So this is a special event, the 20th anniversary of me getting a ladder out and writing on the ceiling with a #2 pencil. I suppose I could of lied and told you that I shimmied up the pole and did this deed, but that would be wrong. When you hear someone refer to me as KOD, you now know that it is deciphered as Kurt of Dirt.

On the walk back to the West bank, I snapped a few more pictures. The first one is the shoe tree off of the Washington Bridge. I don’t know the story behind this tree. I learned back in the 90s that shoes hanging from power lines was a signal of a drug deal meeting place. I don’t think that applies here, though. It is probably a viral thing. Someone threw a few shoes in the tree, and then others thought it was cool and followed suit.

Two of the main West Bank bars during my college years were 5 corners saloon and the 400 bar. The 400 bar was undergoing a little bit of a face lift. Look what they uncovered under the siding. If you can’t read it, it says “Drug Store”. I thought that was cool. That blue picture thing is over the old entrance to the bar.

Here is a pic of formerly the 5 Corners Saloon. Pretty trippy, eh. As you can see, now known as Nomad World Pub. Urban and World music is now played there. When it was 5 corners, typical bands were of the blues/rock genre. You can see in the picture that a sign was removed. This reveals the old paint job with word Saloon almost entirely visible. The Zoyx Attorney tended bar at “the 5” for, well, a long time. This is how she got all worldly wise, so she can solve all of my problems. She is an “icon” of the west bank, yah know.

I ate some frozen pizza at Palmer’s, while hanging out with the Zoyx attorney and the Evil Anti-Martha (Stewart). This was the third farewell happy hour that I participated in with the Zoyx attorney. Hopefully that is enough. She can leave now without me feeling any guilt.

Now the paragraph you have been waiting for… enjoy.

This evening, I had a “specialist” look at my “basement” seepage. He thinks he can “treat” the seepage problem, while working around the sewage “man hole”, and with no “probing”. The back of my “place” has good “drainage”, so no need to work around my “back door”. Hopefully this will solve my “plumbing” problem.

Another Spar Video

Taken the same day as this video. I had just purchased my camera, and was using Spar as my target.

Still trying to get used to Spar not being around. For instance, whenever I get home, Spar tried to make a mad dash through the door and run outside. I would enter the door with my leg strategically located to block him. I am still doing this. He also would appear at the sliding patio door when he wanted to come in. I catch myself glancing over there to see if he wants to come in. I remember it took a year to get Bombo the Cat out of my daily patterns, probably take the same time for Spar.